Dude

Dude i live in San Fran now.

Dude I have an empty blog titled, "Who Killed Prince Humperdink?" which I have no idea what I'm going to do with.

Dude.

Cliff jumping

Zipping up the suit, making sure harness & clips in place, sizing up the jump....

Gonna be big, but i've done this before. Nerves are settling and I'm no longer looking down, and only looking back a few paces to remember the steps that brought me here. Not the frantic dance, but the calm steps that took me to the cliff...

Walking Scotland.

If anyone could love anything more... it would be a miracle. Healing, inspirational, foundational Scotland. Goosebumps (and there goes my solid leg-shaving job this morning, dammit!).

IT'S THAT TIME AGAIN

...escape! 30, Dirty, and Flirty baby! Highlander-style.

muwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha (deep breath) hahahahaha. Yesssss.

Anywho! Fergalicious, Megamoo, Elizabethita, Michaelo, Juliana, Zannahbanana, et all, are about to get tackled with an american style bear hug and raspberries galore from a very silly girl.

Jesus Henry Christopher Christ. There might be a (calming breath)...Colin... sighting? Dear god. Married Scotsman are dangerous. Thankfully Joious will be with me, and a bottle of Edradour, and a Viking hat, and a phote for tweeeetering.

Actually quite nervous at the moment. Little memories fell from the heavens into my stomach, where's they're running around like wee lil chickens without heads, or muppets in a snow-globe post-shaking. Or Smurfs. Yes, I like the idea that my anxious-nervous are in the image of smurfs. Crazy, crazy smurfs. Anyway, this is my coping mechanism. Expectations are a bitch. The less, the better. Thus is escape.

Can you bring nerf guns on planes?

Gone is the Glass

If cats are my kryptonite, hugs are my undoing... my Achilles heal, if you will. Fucking Achilles, had to go and become an analogy that sheds light on my weaknesses, huh. Way to go, champ.

I can't fight the power of a sincere hug. And two hugs? BOO.



Not (le uber sigh) fair.

The pitiful pitfalls of pits

I'M STUCK IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION! gopaweugo2443jy23298yuq3yjhsa;.

Emmy please. Thank you. I dedicate this to bridges burned. May your soot find a peaceful resting place somewhere with lovely scenery, far, far away from MBFW-esque villainy.

Now. Time to focus on focusing. Life moves on, silly girl. Chin up, mantel clock and all.

Onward and Awayward

Bridge burning takes a lot out of a girl. All good things must come to an end. And oh, what an end.

I feel like Johnny Cash, self-destructing all over the place, only without the drug habit to exacerbate the situation. Cut and run, silly girl, cut and run. I heard the hills are nice this time of year. Or big rocks, their shadows make for good hiding. I hope there are big rocks by those big metal bridges up north (fyi - metal, ye kin? no wood burning for silly girls). Too bad there's big sharks too. Stupid sharks.

BURIED IN HIS JAMMIES?!

He was born in Arizona, Moved to Babylona... KING TUT.

Okay-- why is it that Steve Martin isn't a god yet? Steven Spielburg is a god. Harrison Ford is a god. Heck-- the "its time to make the donuts" guy is practically IMMORTAL. Steve Martin-- where ever you are. Your brilliance is ritualistically celebrated with fruit punch (raspberry/apple juice, no citrus. Damn cats) and a solid community stoning.

I have found a new PRINCESSY style for my over-long locks. They're pre-wig now (for Locks of Love) and well out of control. It's Princess Bride meets Princess Leia meets Princess Crown. or Princess crown, since it's an object. I might get some enamle to keep it this way. Sleep on it. Eat on it. head spin on it. Like a freakin' rock.

Das is all for now.

ALL HAIL STEVE.

Tales from the Woman with a Thousand Heads

So... I found the witch. Turns out she's me. Or I'm she. Or Me's she. Whatever.

Lately I've been sporting the "dreamy-eyed Hermit" head. Too comfy to fight. The worst part is, people are starting to notice. ZOINKS.

So, I've not really participated in this thing for like, derrrr, ages. I've been meaning to start up ye new livejournal. Perhaps I will?

But in the mean time, I will keep my house of lies and piracy for exactly what I need-- a place to ramble truthfuly in round about sentences sounding more like lies than the trooooof.

Started writing again. Hopefully that will bring back my core. I miss my core. It's been replaced by a deep-seeded side-mouth. What's a side-mouth? It's that thing that helps you double talk, or talk around issues. I don't like that side mouth and I want it gone.

Found a spiritual healer recently. Actually, his biz card fell from the sky. CAn't get more meaningful than that. Hindu-helper, I shall give you a ring (-a ling ling. Thank you Mr. Wonka).

So, DON'T STOP THINKIN' ABOUY TOMORROW. And all that jazz.

SOX, i like to wear them

White ones are the best.

I miss Cardiff and Edinburgh as much as if i had lost my left arm somewhere during the night. Sigh.

What would you do if I sang out of tune, would you stand up and Karaoke with me? Play me old dears, and I'll sing you a song, and hot damn, i will try to sing out of key. I get by with a little help of my friends, I go bi(polar) with a little help of my friends.

See what happens with the hermit sets in? My life gets slow. I blame the bears game yesterday. Rain, cold, and Whiskey Eileen = insanity.

Ciao 4 now.

Some day

Some day the no-talent police are going to come and take me away for being a hack at life.

Until then, i'm riding this as far as i can go.

I spent all day playing video games AT WORK. And they encouraged it.

Cars, cars, cars.

Why do people suck at driving? Why do they suck at parking? Why must i use my aggressive driving skills to teach the world to drive?

Because i'm eeeeevil. ;) JK.

My name is Jonas

Edinburgh is a slice o heaven. Like a mint chocolate chip shake. like a freshly baked homemade chocolate chip cookie. like a hot guy checking you out.

no...... its better.

I have nothing interesting to say ever. I feel like a dullard. I'M A DULLARD. pity party for one.


Thank you.

Ignore the lack of picture. It'll be there soon. Soon, pet, soooooon.

YOUR MOMMA DRESSES LIKE A MONKEY

Amygilly.

HOw the heck is one suppose to post on your blog if YOU haven't posted, hmmmmmmmm?

Get on that, YO!

I have spoken.

I'll take the high road, thank you very much

I'll take the high road, you take the low road and I'll be in Scotland BEFORE YEEE

Damn straight.
Aug. 18th. On the bonny bonny banks of Loch Lomond.

No no no.

I was straight up the Lone Wolf, but with hints of the shoveller. You were Baby Bowler with hints of Blue Raja. Cara was and will always be the Sphinx with hints of invisible boy!!!

Headaches, underwear, and shoes are the...

bane of my existence. Two are something I'll have to deal with one day, and the third is just a pain in my ass.

So very nau-ghty.

Many apologies for my lack of blog attention. The real world has kicked my ass in that kind of "i like being productive"/"i miss doing nothing but writing all day" kinda way.

So yes. Here I am. Here. That's where I am.

Can I just say how GORGEOUS chicago is? My god. Walking around with Willa is hilarious and really visually entertaining. And there's always something new to look at- quite appropraite for yours truly and my short attention span. It's like where's waldo, but I haven't quite figured out what waldo is.

Some man called me a MILF last night. He's said it before (he's a door guy to an outdoor pub on state), but I thought he called me ralph. Nope, he called me Milf. Double edged sword of a comment. Thanks and do i really look that old? oh well. age? just another adventure. yes. crazy is as crazy does as an 80 year old woman- that's my philosophy.

Off to artichokes. ciao for now.

Totum Poles aren't so scary from the bottom.

Work is fantabulous.

Nice people, nice work, tedious work, happy work, boring work, but work that I like. Still finding my way up the brick path. Nice color yellow. Now only if scarecrow was canadian. The cowardly lion is a comedian mike in a cubs hate. Now I've just gotta pin point the wicked witch (i think i know who she is) and stay the hell away. The witch my house fell on is subdued and likes me (hence the red shoes on my feet) and Glenda, my individual guide, sits kiddycorner to me. Tin man is a lawyer and hates the cold of the air conditioning (makes his joints creeky). The kid is toto and she follows me everywhere. The man behind the curtain is never around and she's a chick.

But all in all the emerald city isn't such a crazy place.

As long as the queen with a hundred heads doesn't make an appearance i think i just might make it.

Nothin of interest

Oatmeal is good.

Re-educating the homeless

Sisterly spat, ready? go.
How did you not know I was moving? It's all over my posts- like a whole two or three of 'em. Or maybe just one. But still- there's that one!

I'm in the gold coast (i.e. "I love goooooooold" post) now in a fantabulous apartment. Dawn is 2 miles away. Work is two miles away. And Caprini Green is two miles away (or less). Michigan Ave is like 4/5 blocks away (or less). I'm working for Star Farm Productions (i.e. the "phew" post)- which deals with the Edgar and Ellen books (for teens) and cartoons for nickelodean, nick jr, disney, PBS, etc. OF course none of them are on air as of now- it's a young company, but we've just sold deals to those companies and we are doing marketing with Target and Sam's Club, etc. I start monday.

I have to email you my addy for mrs. tracy of the big sis persuasion.

I wish you'd move here with us so we could build you a nice cardboard mansion. State of the art. I love the homeless prez. She's my twinlet.